A little note to all my ladies on women’s day…
I know I'm a little late, but happy international women’s day to all the beautiful souls. I have a little something to share with you on account of that. In my glorious 26 years of being alive, I have seen plenty of patriarchy swirling around and felt that the world could use some change. There are a zillion things the world needs to change to make the earth a better place for women to be, for everyone to be. I cannot pen down all of them, but I will share my two views on the topic.
We label women. We label people.
Back when I was still doing my undergraduate degree, an internship was also part of the curriculum. So I moved to a new city, in hopes to learn more about my profession and you know, as any other girl would say “ to start a new life”. There was another male intern who worked alongside me and he got to visit sites and meet clients (since I was interning for an architecture firm). I felt I was missing out on a lot of learning opportunities and practical knowledge, so I gathered my guts and approached my male boss to allow me to visit sites as well. To which he responded, “ you know Neha, You are too delicate for site visits”. That’s it. That's what it took to make me never go on the site ever again. Now that I look back, I realize that I gave up too quickly. It was my job to learn. It was my responsibility to see where my career was going. But, because I subconsciously registered what he said was “true”. I seldom tried.
On the other hand, It was his responsibility to treat both the interns equally, Irrespective of their gender. He labeled me as “delicate” and assumed that visiting construction sites was simply not something I'm qualified to do. That label nearly cost me my career because I carried that comment for so long.
Lesson: Don't let other people’s perceptions of you be the final verdict of who you will be. Do not judge someone based on what you see and what you don't see. Do not label.
There is no definition for “good woman”.
I recently came across this reel while scrolling through Instagram and it was about how we define women. Our definition of a good woman is someone who puts everyone first except herself. You never see a “good mother” having lunch before her kids. You never see a “good wife” wear short clothes. Ah! So many rules of what defines a good woman!. As a society, we condemn women who put themselves first. We condemn women who take care of themselves. Good women don't do this, good women don't do that! Oh! Can we let it go already!
Lesson: Let us not associate with such narratives. A good woman can not be defined. There is no measuring scale to measure who is good or who is bad. So it's time to let go of the measuring scale that measures how “good” a woman is.
I hope you beautiful women and men do not settle for less or what is offered to you and stand on the freaking table and raise a glass, and demand for what is rightfully yours!
Cheers to womanhood.Cheers to life
On that account